The end and beginning of the year are full of celebrations for us: birthdays, anniversaries of weddings and baptisms, and this year, January 1st also marks the second full year of using a Tickler system. I check it faithfully every evening before bed and have never fallen behind. GTD (Getting Things Done) and Flylady came into play later (2010 and 2011 respectively) but with these three elements my life is most significantly easier, more organized, and most importantly or me, more peaceful psychologically. I used to refuse to go out and have fun because I had to “just get my head together” and by that I mean somehow figure out just what I have to do and how I’m going to get it done. No matter what I did I still ended up stressed and not having my “head together.” I could enjoy time off only by suppressing the worry I always carried inside me that I was missing something very important somewhere in the piles of papers and scribbled “To Do” lists lying scattered here and there. My desk was never clean, and my room hardly either. I did not enjoy this state, but frantic “I can’t stand this anymore” clean-ups would quickly deteriorate into chaos once more. I wish I could go into all the psychological aspects of living a disorganized life and switching to an organized one, but I doubt I could sufficiently express it, that too many people would be interested in it, and besides, this post will be quite too long enough as it is.
This is a post written mostly for my own reference. I’ve documented how I organize and run my life so I can look back later and see how things have changed and improved. If you are interested in such details, read on. Otherwise, feel no guilt in skipping.
Important Ideas to Live By
- A place for everything and everything in its place. It’s a great saying, but finding a place for everything is the main challenge for me. GTD inspired the idea that there should be a place for EVERYTHING, even the smallest scrap of paper, and helped me find ways to make a logical place for each thing. Also, it helps MAKE me make a place for everything. Not everything is in its ideal place yet, but everything is in the “system” and has a safe place for now (i.e. no important papers sitting in a random pile).
- Babysteps. Break everything down into the smallest psychological step. It might sound inefficient, but when procrastination, fear, and a guilty conscience are at play, the only way to keep a mole hill from becoming a mountain is to break everything down into babysteps.
- Do right away that which does not get easier with time. In other words, clean up after yourself right away (prime example: dishes). Even if you have to make the baby wait. Better yet, make the baby help you clean up the toys before naptime, then you have clean floors the moment he’s down for his nap! It also makes the morning Quick Sweep a breeze – and now my floors are always clean! (My Quick Sweep is a dance with the broom as fast as I can in the main traffic areas. It takes less than 10 minutes and gets rid of 90% of the dirt and dust. Thanks Flylady!)
- Don’t do something right away just because you can. Get it all in your system first, then you know what’s to be done and can judge with a clear mind what is the best use of your time at the moment. It also makes schedule rest and rejuvenation possible.
- Good enough is better than perfect. A difficult concept at first, this is “perfect” advice for a perfectionist. Ask yourself, just how well does this task need to be completed? What is the minimum effort that will be “good enough.” Save your energy and perfectionism for things that really count.
- You can’t organize clutter. From Flylady: don’t organize it, get rid of it! As I cleaned up I used to think “what could I use this for?” and now I think “can I possible do without this?” and it has made it so much easier to pare down our possessions to a manageable amount in the small space we have.
- Make it run by itself. Think once, then go on autopilot. Get the mundane running along with minimal effort so you can put your mind and soul into important things. Housecleaning routines like the Quick Seep and Swish and Swipe (a 2 minute bathroom job) in the morning keep the house “company ready in 15 minutes” (Flylady), are easy to keep up once they are habit, and treat your family (and yourself) to clean house all the time. What a gift! The GTD system does the same for managing maintenance in other parts of life.
- Never do for a child what he can do for himself. –Glenn Doman This helps me remember to ask myself, “Can Joseph do this himself?” and to take the time and patience to give him the chance to try. Now at 18 months he can pick up his toys (still with help, but sometimes without being asked), eat with a fork or spoon, dump his potty in the toilet and flush, help with the laundry, and other things that will soon save me lots of time and effort. Without this saying, it’s just easier to do it myself – but what a trap that will be later on in life!
- Open your eyes. I don’t know what to call this one, but Flylady’s challenge to always keep my sink shiny did the eye-opening trick for me. My sister once said that one difference between a ‘cleany’ and a ‘messy’ (I don’t know the book she got it from) was that if something is out of place it starts to blend into the surroundings for a ‘messy’ until she no longer sees it, but for a ‘cleany’ it sticks out more and more each day. How do you train yourself to see? That is a tough one. Somehow having a beautiful sink and knowing that I’d have to wipe it down every evening before bed made me see the dirty dishes better (crazy?) and that lead to wanting to get them done sooner and success with a pretty sink led to my eyes being opened on all fronts. I don’t keep a very shiny sink anymore, but its done its duty (thanks, Flylady).
Part II Comming Soon (I hope)
